Tuesday, May 26, 2009
I Look Good at 50mph
I was driving through DC with my buddy Wes going to a Baltimore Orioles game.
There is no photo of me or Wes, just a picture of the license plate.
I did not know they would triangulate speed with a picture and a laser, resulting in a ticket.
If this is legal (clearly it is since I got a ticket, right?), why don't more states do this? I mean c'mon, you don't even need a cop to catch a speeder? How many state budgets could be fixed by this tool.
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I am irritated by it. Clearly, my brakes are being hit, which leads me to believe that I was slowing down...possibly a change in speed limit?
I got caught speeding. Clearly red handed, but it does not make much sense to me. I rarely, if ever, go over the speed limilt like they are saying I did.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Sheep, Wolves and Sheepdogs
To: Jill Edwards, Student, University of Washington
Subject: Sheep, Wolves and Sheepdogs
Miss Edwards,
I read of your student activity regarding the proposed memorial to Colonel Greg Boyington, USMC and a Medal of Honor winner. I suspect you will receive many angry emails from conservative people like me. You may be too young to appreciate fully the sacrifices of generations of servicemen and servicewomen, on whose shoulders you and your fellow students stand. I forgive you for the untutored ways of youth and your naiveté. It may be that you are simply a sheep.
There's no dishonor in being a sheep, as long as you know and accept what you are. William J. Bennett, in a lecture to the United States Naval Academy November 24, 1997 said, "Most of the people in our society are sheep. They are kind, gentle, productive creatures who can only hurt one another by accident. We may well be in the most violent times in history, but violence is still remarkably rare. This is because most citizens are kind, decent people, not capable of hurting each other except by accident or under extreme provocation. They are sheep.
Then there are the wolves who feed on the sheep without mercy. Do you believe there are wolves out there who will feed on the flock without mercy? You better believe it. There are evil men in this world and they are capable of evil deeds. The moment you forget that or pretend it is not so, you become a sheep. There is no safety in denial.
Then there are sheepdogs and I'm a sheepdog. I live to protect the flock and confront the wolf. If you have no capacity for violence and you are a healthy productive citizen, you are a sheep. If you have a capacity for violence and no empathy for your fellow citizens, then you have defined an aggressive sociopath, a wolf. But what if you have a capacity for violence, and a deep love for your fellow citizens? What do you have then? A sheepdog, a warrior, someone who is walking the uncharted path. Someone who can walk into the heart of darkness, into the universal human phobia, and hopefully walk out unscathed.
We know that the sheep live in denial; that is what makes them sheep. They do not want to believe that there is evil in the world. They can however accept the fact that fires can happen, which is why they want fire extinguishers, fire sprinklers, fire alarms and fire exits throughout their kid's schools. But many of them are outraged at the idea of putting an armed police officer in their kid's school. Their children are thousands of times more likely to be killed or seriously injured by school violence than fire, but the sheep's only response to the possibility of violence is denial. The idea of someone coming to kill or harm their child is just too hard. So they choose the path of denial.
The sheep generally do not like the sheepdog. He looks a lot like the wolf. He has fangs and the capacity for violence. The difference, though, is that the sheepdog must not, cannot and will not ever harm the sheep. Any sheepdog that intentionally harms the lowliest little lamb will be punished severely. The world cannot work any other way, at least not in a Republic such as ours.
Still, the sheepdog disturbs the sheep. He is a constant reminder that there are wolves in the land. The sheep would prefer that he didn't tell them where to go, or give them traffic tickets, or stand at the ready in their airports, in camouflage fatigues, holding an M-16. The sheep would much rather have the sheepdog cash in his fangs, spray paint himself white, and go Baa. That is, until the wolf shows up, and then the entire flock tries desperately to hide behind one lonely sheepdog.
Case in point -- The students, the victims, at Columbine High School were big, tough, know-it-all high school students, and under ordinary circumstances would not have had the time of day for a police officer. They were not bad kids; they just had nothing to say to a cop. When the school was under attack, however, and SWAT teams were clearing the rooms and hallways, the officers had to physically peel those clinging, sobbing kids off of them.
This is how the little lambs feel about their sheepdog when the wolf is at the door. Look at what happened after September 11, 2001 when the wolf pounded hard on the door. Remember how America, more than ever before, felt differently about their law enforcement officers and military personnel? Understand that there is nothing morally superior about being a sheepdog; it is just what some have chosen to be.
You need to understand that a sheepdog is a funny critter. He is always sniffing around out on the perimeter, checking the breeze, barking at things that go bump in the night and yearning for a righteous battle. Better said, the young sheepdogs yearn for a righteous battle. The old sheepdogs are a little older and wiser, but they still move to the sound of the guns when needed, right along with the young ones.
Here is how the sheep and the sheepdog think differently. The sheep pretend the wolf will never come, but the sheepdog lives for that day. After the attacks on September 11, 2001, most of the sheep, that is, most citizens in America said "Thank God I wasn't on one of those planes." The sheepdogs, the warriors, said,"Dear God, I wish I could have been on one of those planes. Maybe I could have made a difference." They want to be able to make a difference.
There is nothing morally superior about the sheepdog, the warrior, but he does have one real advantage. Only one. And that is that he is able to survive and thrive in an environment that would destroy 98 percent of the population.
Some people may be destined to be sheep and others might be genetically primed to be wolves or sheepdogs. But I believe that most people can choose which one they want to be, and I'm proud to say that more and more Americans are choosing to become sheepdogs.
Seven months after the attack on September 11, 2001, Todd Beamer was honored in his hometown of Cranbury, New Jersey. Todd, as you recall, was the man on Flight 93 over Pennsylvania who called on his cell phone to alert an operator from United Airlines about the hijacking. When they learned of the three other passenger planes who had used weapons, Todd and the other passengers confronted the terrorist hijackers. In one hour, a transformation occurred among the passengers - athletes, business people and parents - from sheep to sheepdogs and together they fought the wolves, ultimately saving an unknown number of lives on the ground.
Edmund Burke said "There is no safety for honest men except by believing all possible evil of evil men." Here is the point I strive to emphasize, especially to the thousands of police officers and soldiers I speak to each year. In nature the sheep, real sheep, are born as sheep. Sheepdogs are born that way, and so are wolves. They don't have a choice. But you are not a critter. As a human being, you can be whatever you want to be. It is a conscious, moral decision. If you want to be a sheep, then you can be a sheep and that is okay, but you must understand the price you pay.
When the wolf comes, you and your loved ones are going to die if there is not a sheepdog there to protect you. If you want to be a wolf, you can be one, but the sheepdogs are going to hunt you down and you will never have rest, safety, trust or love. But if you want to be a sheepdog and walk the warrior's path, then you must make a conscious and moral decision every day to dedicate, equip and prepare yourself to thrive in that toxic, corrosive moment when the wolf comes knocking at the door.
This business of being a sheep or a sheepdog is not a yes-no dichotomy. It is not an all-or-nothing, either-or choice. It is a matter of degrees, a continuum. On one end is an abject, head-in-the-sand-sheep and on the other end is the ultimate warrior. Few people exist completely on one end or the other. Most of us live somewhere in between.
Since 9-11 almost everyone in America took a step up that continuum, away from denial. The sheep took a few steps toward accepting and appreciating their warriors, and the warriors started taking their job more seriously.
Its OK to be a sheep, but do not kick the sheepdog. Indeed, the sheepdog may just run a little harder, strive to protect you a little better and be fully prepared to pay an ultimate price in battle and spirit with the sheep moving from "baa" to "thanks." We do not call for gifts or freedoms beyond our lot. Just like the sheepdog, we in the military just need a small pat on the head, a smile and a thank you to fill the emotional tank which is drained protecting the sheep. And, when our number is called by The Almighty, and day retreats into night, a small prayer before the heavens just may be in order to say thanks for letting you continue to be a sheep. But also be grateful for the millions of American sheepdogs who permit you the freedom to express even bad ideas.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Movies, Toad and Norway in June


Sunday, May 17, 2009
Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus
How great does that look, huh?
I mean, Debbie Gibson and Lorenzo Llamas, a gigantic shark and humongous octopus...how could that possibly be bad?
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Cereal Makes Me Fat
I just had one.
The back story is that I eat fast. I never really understood why. I have a lot of people to blame. My buddy Craig and I used to get into speed eating contests. My siblings (all 5 of them) liked to steal food off big brother's plate. Sports waited for no man and I needed to finish faster so I could get back out and play. The list goes on and on.
I have tried all sorts of cures. Putting my fork down between bites, counting my chews and even counting to 10 before taking a bite before swallowing. All of them make my food cold and I don't enjoy eating when that happens.
This morning, however, I solved the mystery. It is cereal's fault.
I have been eating cereal regularly since I was a kid. Love me some Fruity Pebbles, Frosted Mini-Wheat's, Capt'n Crunch (Berries and PB variety in particular) and Lucky Charms.
All of those are not so good when soggy. So I eat them quickly.
It is the first meal of the day and has been for a long time.
That speed eating is tough to stop.
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Now that I have a logical scapegoat, I need to pitch it off a cliff.
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Today is my birthday. I am going to eat whatever I want, drink whatever I want, watch baseball, talk on the phone and slap my wife's butt...in other words, my birthday will be just like any other day.
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I calculate that 11/28th of my life is over...so yeah, I got that going for me.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Virginia Boy Sounds Dirty
I think I cried a little when it happened.
I know I died a little at the moment it occurred.
I think I can no longer call myself a California boy.
Bye-bye California Driver's License. Hello Virginia Driver's License.
It is a sad day in the Team Bogart Household!
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On the bright side, they did extend my license out to 2016 without requiring a test, so I got that going for me.
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I know I waited 18 months to get it done, but I just could not let go. Unfortunately, it expires on my birthday this week and I was forced to succumb.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Hang on Sloopy
I have never been the big fan. I have enjoyed his music some, but I never bought any of his albums (even though I own over 600) and never really appreciated his work.
Then a couple of months ago, Claire's boss invited me to see him in concert. I am always up for a road trip, so I jumped in. I prepared by borrowing 10 Springsteen CD's and listening to them in heavy rotation. I was very surprised to realize, I like a lot of his music...especially the stuff that did not get radio play.
Concert day arrived, 4 hour drive, 2 hour wait, then BADLANDS!
I was on my feet, clapping, dancing and singing the few words I knew.
One song in and I was hooked. I became a Springsteen fan that night.
Even with The Boss appearing to be sick most of the concert (Pig Flu?) he put on a good show. He even played a cover of Hang On Sloopy. Yes, that Hang On Sloopy.
Great show, good times.
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Drove 4 hours home after the concert and got in a bit after 3am. I tried to crawl into bed as quietly as I could, but I bumped Claire and that woke her up.
No problem, she usually goes right back to sleep...not tonight. I was tired (it was after 3am!) and she wanted to hear all about it.
I sorta obliged. Through my sleep induced stupor I think I told her something like:
Fun drive, music loud, hang on sloopy, dance, good times...
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If anyone is curious (You Boss fans are), here is the set list for the night:
Setlist:Badlands (w/ Jay Weinberg)
Radio Nowhere (w/ Jay Weinberg)
Outlaw Pete (w/ Jay Weinberg)
No Surrender (w/ Jay Weinberg)
Working on a Dream (w/ Jay Weinberg)
Seeds (w/ Jay Weinberg)
Johnny 99 (w/ Jay Weinberg)
The Ghost of Tom Joad (w/ Jay Weinberg)
Raise Your Hand (w/ Jay Weinberg)
Seventh Son
Hang on Sloopy
Growin' Up
I'm on Fire
Waitin' on a Sunny Day
The Promised Land
Human Touch
Kingdom of Days
Lonesome Day
The Rising
Born to Run
Cadillac Ranch
* * *
Hard Times (w/ Jay Weinberg)
Thunder Road (w/ Jay Weinberg)
Tenth Avenue Freeze-out (w/ Jay Weinberg)
Land of Hope and Dreams (w/ Jay Weinberg)
American Land (w/ Jay Weinberg and Frank Bruno, Jr.)
Glory Days (w/ Jay Weinberg)
Monday, May 4, 2009
Is There a Safety Word?
When I arrived, they were taking apart the bed, packing boxes and shuffling things around to get ready for the move.
We began by taking out the entertainment unit. Then a couple of bookshelves, followed by the bed.
The dresser was the next obvious thing. I suggested that we should probably take out the drawers and my buddy agreed. Then he asked me to leave the room for a minute because his wife would not want other men seeing the contents of the top two drawers.
I figured that, like most people, the contents of the top drawers were delicate unmentionables. I have 4 sisters and a wife, so I fully appreciate and understand that many ladies are a little shy when it comes to their underwear and bras. Having other men see them can be a little embarrassing. I get that.
So, being the good husband, he took out the top two drawers and put them in the bathroom, closing the door. I was then invited back into the room to continue the process.
We took out the next two drawers. What was in those you ask?
Underwear and bras.
Hmmmmm.
What do you think were in the top two drawers?
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I figure DKG is the most likely to know.
Friday, May 1, 2009
Fruity Pebbles and Changing the World
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Go To Your Room, Richard Blais


Monday, April 27, 2009
If You Can't Beat'em, Eat'em
We started with a great day going downtown. We ate lunch at Mother's (it was good, but WAY overpriced!)


We toured around the city, tried a pineapple mojito (really good) and then went to the Insectarium. Now, I am not a fan of bugs. Really don't like them much. Spiders in particular are, well, difficult for me. But I pushed through, learning all about the creepy crawly things that populate the world.
To add a topper to this afternoon, we had the opportunity to enact a little revenge on the insects. It was time to eat them.



The Insectarium provided a place for us to taste a number of different kinds and flavors. We actually enjoyed it and I even bought some bugs to take home for Claire to sample.
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Dachshund Poop and Hot Chicks!
I had some free time this afternoon while he was at work, so I went in search of the "Best Lunch in Charlotte".
The Internet did not let me down.
It directed me to Price's Chicken Coop, which, while not fancy, was greasy, messy and oh so tasty!
I ordered a dark meat sandwich...which consisted of a bun with a fried chicken leg and thigh, bones and all tossed on them. For good measure, I also ordered a side of fried gizzard...one of my favorite things since I was a kid.
Those Doxie Turd looking things were glorious!
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Heading back to VA on Friday for date night with my wife. We are going to see that Disney movie Earth.
Nothing like date night with a Hot Chick!
Monday, April 20, 2009
Was it a State Fair?




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During the party, some of the young boys brought out remote controlled helicopters. While nobody was particularly adept at flying them, it was a lot of fun.
When the party started to die down and the RC Helo's disappeared, my brother-in-law Kyle, a friend Nick and I were looking for a toy to play with...we found them. At Wal-Mart.
We bought RC Airplanes.
We flew them in the day.
We flew them in the night.
We flew them up and down.
Flying them was tight!

Friday, April 17, 2009
Kickball is Rough
Instead, I am hopping (literally) off to the hospital trying to figure out why I can't walk.
Apparently this kickball thing is not good for me or Claire.
***UPDATE 12:03pm***
Okay, so I hit up the Doc-in-a-Box and he said I tore a muscle in the arch of my foot...Hydrocodone and Ibuprofen as needed, wrapping up my arch and as much rest as possible.
This sucks...I am out for at least 2 weeks...the kickball team is down their Sensei and the Softball season will start without me. Stupid feet.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
She Needs A Break
"I am looking forward to my surgery in June. It will be a good vacation."
Sunday, April 12, 2009
The First Excuse

On Thursday night we played kickball...it was our first team practice.
Claire was on first base and playing like a champ. She caught anything and everything that came her way. A stud. Surefire MVP candidate for 2009 Young Ninja Krew (YNK Kickball team). But late in the practice, the unthinkable happened...our budding star got into a collision with another player. A new teammate. We will call her the executioner.
She looked like Scotty Pippen. Not the Executioner, Claire.
She never cried. Never fell down. Never blacked out.
It just looked like the top of her head was smuggling a golf ball.
If it did not hurt so bad, it would have been funny.
My wife is a champ.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Military ID's
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I look like I am the one in the military rather than Claire. I need to get a new haircut or something.
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Claire also got a cool little gift from my mom this week...an outfit that I wore when I was first born...complete with little baseball shoes.
I don't think I have ever seen Claire so happy about a gift...it was definitely on par with the engagement ring.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Wedding...West Coast Edition



The Ceremony was nice and short. We read our vows again, so as to make sure each of our friends knew that we want to be kept accountable to what was promised to one another...

Then we partied...it was wonderful. We even got some time in the Pool/Spa. 


Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Tango?
While on our Honeymoon, Claire and I had dinner next door to a Tango Restaurant. As a matter of fact, the place was called "Tango".
The video shows the band that was playing at "Tango". I have a decent idea of what Tango Music is. Clearly, something that is not translating well.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Two Hidden Pools...One Fun, One "Different"
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On the Eastern most tip of the island lies the California Lighthouse. It was a nice view and a cool place to see, but the real jewel is another protected cove. This one is a little more open to the water, so there are very small waves, but it is safe and had great rocks to climb on.
When Claire and I first found it, we talked about how beautiful it was. How desolate it was. How private it was. How great it would be to come back again. We called it Bogart and Claire's Hidden Pool.
Unfortunately for us, when we did return to "Bogart and Claire's Hidden Pool", it was not so desolate or romantic...at least not for us.
Turns out, this "hidden pool" was less hidden and more swing'n...when Claire and I walked up, the beach housed 5 or 6 naked, middle-aged men. No, they were clearly not there for the sun.
They scattered as soon as Claire and I showed up. They watched our every move. Looked at her with disdain and me with disappointment. We were strong though. We stayed an hour or so...then we left.
Left them and their sexy man beach to themselves.
