Monday, October 18, 2010

No really, I can do weddings in other States...oh wait, you are the Commonwealth.

So I went before the judge and he grilled me...full and total third degree. (Part 1 Here)

Bogart, please step forward.

So it says here you want to perform marriages in the Commonwealth of Virginia.  Why? 
Why would your friends want you to marry them?
Why would you fly from Missouri all the way to Virginia just to perform a wedding?
How did you meet the couple?  What was your connection to Virginia Beach that made you move here and meet them?  Why can't they find someone local to perform the ceremony?
What makes you think you should be allowed to marry people in the Commonwealth?
Have you performed weddings before?

And my personal favorite question that the judge asked me in the 20 minutes of grilling...

Are you in the military?  Why not?


Yes, those were all very real questions that were asked by a very real judge.  No, it was not a joke, but I did look around, wondering if I was on some sort of hidden camera show.

Even the bailiff was shrugging his shoulders and mouthing "I DON'T KNOW" when I looked to him for moral support.

But wait...there's more...


After 20 minutes of grilling 2 different law books and very awkward pauses the judge set forth his ruling...

"Mr. Bogart, it is clear that you are not qualified to perform marriage ceremonies in the Commonwealth of Virginia...however, I will allow you to perform one marriage for one day only.  Now go downstairs and they will swear you in."

So, I got sworn "Defend the Constitution of the United States and the Commonwealth of Virginia" and to perform the wedding duties to the best of my ability, so help me God...



See if I ever go back to perform a wedding ceremony in that non-state.

Friday, October 15, 2010

Hope the Judge Likes My Suit

"Hi, I am here in Virginia to perform a marriage ceremony.  I am licensed in the state of California as a Baptist Minister and I need to know what form I need to fill out so my license is recognized here."

That is how my morning started at the Clerk of the Court office in Virginia Beach.  3 1/2 hours and 5 people later, including the Chief Deputy Clerk and I am scheduled to stand before a judge today.  What this judge is looking for, I am not really sure, but I have had to call the church in San Diego and have them fax any and all paperwork that exists regarding my Pastoral License.

In Louisiana, all I had to do was walk in, show them my letter, sign a book and I was good to go.  Yup, I can marry and bury people in Louisiana. 

Virginia, however, takes this stuff extremely seriously.  I have to go to a courtroom and have a judge review my documents, talk to me a bit (I have no clue what he/she will ask) and decide if I am worthy to sign a marriage license in the great Commonwealth of Virginia. 

Lucky day!!!

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Hey Claire...SURPRISE

Well Baby...What do you think?


Now you can see why my back is a little sore...600lbs of dirt and 37 bags of mulch (74 Cubic Feet).

Okay, it is a lot sore.

Love you!


And to let everyone else in on the action...Claire half-way through her 24-day away, I have taken some of that time to do some projects.  The front yard is just the first.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Industrial Length Slip-n-Slide

So, as I have lamented before, I have a rather large yard. 

One of the big benni's of that is that I have a lot of room to be creative. 

For example, one weekend in August, we decided to put up a Slip-n-slide...a 150-foot slip-n-slide.

It was so very cool.

We pulled out 3 hoses and a power washer.  We even had a gallon of dish soap to help with the slipping.

It was a blast!

Even if my brother lost his wedding ring, never to be found again!!!

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Depressed because it is so good

Belt holes are funny things.

They can bring you a sense of pride.  Especially when you are two or three belt holes smaller than you used to be.  Sorta like what Poop is experiencing.

They can also be a source of uncomfortable-ness.  As in when you put on a belt that you have had a while and the grooves that hold the clasp are now visible because you can't, quite, comfortably stretch to where it "should" go.  Sorta like what I am experiencing.

After a summer full of BBQ and other assorted mid-west eating, my belt loops are not quite where they should be.  Sure, it does not help that instead of working out, I have been sitting in the office, hanging on the porch with neighbors and lifting ribs to my mouth.

Might need to work on that...not much more room to go before I have to buy a new belt...and if I get past that point, I will need new pants. 

Sobering...but man it was a great summer!!!