Friday, February 8, 2008

The Joys of College Roommates Pt. 2

The set-up of the bathroom is critical. The toilet has to be just behind the door, lined up perfectly for it to work. If you have that direct line, it is so nice for a direct hit.

Next step, take a Ziploc bag and fill it with shaving cream...not all the way full, but maybe 1/3rd full...remember, shaving cream expands and if you fill it too full, the whole thing won't work.

Next, zip the bag closed, slide it 1/2 way under the closed door, forcefully step on the bag and you have just created a shaving cream projectile...it does not hurt when it hits...the spray pattern is pretty tight...the smell is tough to get out. Perfect for pesky roommates.

It was used a lot...Teddy and Jerry's bathroom had the perfect set up. I don't know how many times we hit Jerry...enough that he started to only do "his business" when Mongo and I were not home...but this particular Friday night, we might have surprised him.

Mongo and I walked in the door..."Dude, the bathroom door is shut...I will get the shaving cream, you get the Ziplock."

We got the perfect pour, zipped it shut, and began to slide it under the door...

Cries of "No, no, please no" came from the bathroom. Was he begging? No, it sounded more like he was pleading. "Seriously guys. Please not tonight."

We were 20 years old...the begging and pleading of another man does not phase us...if anything it egged us on. "C'mon guys...pleeeeaaasssseee!" Did I detect a whimper?

Mongo and I looked at each other, shrugged our shoulders, and did the deed. It was a perfect shot...full explusion of the ever expanding, menthol cream. Then silence, followed by some sniffles..."Ah crap, is he crying?" "What did we do, dude?"

Jerry was getting ready for a big date...Jerry was wearing his ONLY suit...really it was his only good clothes. Through the tears Jerry said "You guys suck! This is my only good outfit and now what am I going to wear? " More sniffles followed.

That was the last time we ever pulled the shaving cream bit.

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This story is so much funnier when told in person...I mean, I got the sniffles and the pleading voice down pat...but as I write this, it really does seem mean. Jerry moved out not long after that episode...I do feel bad...I really do. Yes, he was kinda of a sucky roommate...actully he still owes Mongo and me $500 and his girlfriend tried to fight us, literally...but I think it might have been a little mean. Sorry Jerry.

4 comments:

WILLIAM said...

If he still owes you 500 bucks...don't feel bad.

Ok, Where Was I? said...

Yeah, I agree--if he owes you $500, you're even. Still, I gotta feel a little for the guy. I could hear you asking, "Is he crying?!" Ha!

Scarlett Wanna Be said...

Reading this torture posts make me think, "Even if I have to have cramps and go through child birth, I am glad I am a girl." Girls don't do stuff like that. We just barrow clothes and never return them.

kpellatiro said...

scarlett - yeah, lucky you guys. Of course, after puberty, we grow up and become TOTALLY mature.