Friday, August 6, 2010

Tax on the Stupid

I don't like the lotto.  I think it is a tax on the Mathematically Stupid.  I think it disproportionally punishes the uneducated and poor.  It is nothing more than state sanctioned gambling hiding behind the idea that it is "for the kids".

Yet, every week I put $1 into a pool with 3 other Directors at work and play the Powerball.

Why?  That is a good question.  I am sure we are not going to win.  I know that we are lucky to match one number, let alone all 6. 

And yet I can't be left out.  Like those stupid commercials say, "You Never Know". 

What happens if...well, I would be left at my company, the only senior guy, left to run the 3 businesses that the others left behind.  I have enough work to do without having to be the guy picking up the pieces behind those that would do doughnuts in the parking lot after striking it rich.

Why do I play?  Well, because it is fun to spend 5 minutes each week talking about what would be different if we won.  How Rich would pull his car into the driveway outside of Jim's office, throw his office keys and badge through the window attached to a brick, yell something like "Its been a great ride!!" and then burnout all the way from the building to the street.  Or how TB would just call in and say "Good Luck everyone!"  Or even the Goldman...he says he would just quietly not show up.  It is fun to talk about those things.

Why do I play?  Because it is pretty funny to watch the people that work for us spend 10-mins each week trying to figure out why their bosses keep handing $1 bills to each other.  One of them figured it out and then asked what would happen if the four of us won.  "There would be some career opportunities for many of you." we responded...her face went ghostly white.  It was so cool!

The lotto is a stupid waste of money.  I am just handing money to the gas station and getting nothing in return.  It is a tax on the stupid. 

And yet, all four of us high-fived when we won $4 this week.  FOUR BUCKS!!!

Yes, I am a lotto winner.

And I already tossed my buck in for next week.


Phat Jim said...

I play the lottery too. . .in my defense, though, I sometimes wait until the payout comes close to the odds so its a fair bet. Its still pure lunacy.

12ontheinside said...

I play in a syndicate at work as well with the 3 girls I "do lunch" with. A few months ago the big boss called me into his office and said, rather sternly, "I hear you girls are in a lotto syndicate. Did you know it's against company policy to do that?" Then after he paused a moment he continued with, "I won't dob if you let me be in it too!"

WILLIAM said...

I enjoy my stupid tax. Every week i play $3. I pick the same numbers and once a week I check them.

I have probable spent more on the lottery than I have won. I actually won $3700.00 in 2002. But I tell ya the feeling of winning that 3700.00 was worth it.